“Embrace the Suck: Discomfort Can Build a Better You” by Jill Schulman (2025)
🔥 Discomfort Isn’t the Enemy — It’s the Way We Grow
Most of us avoid discomfort, thinking it’s bad. But according to former Marine and positive psychology expert Jill Schulman, doing hard things actually strengthens our brain, our confidence, and our resilience.
💡 Key Ideas:
- Discomfort = Growth Signal
- We’ve been taught to avoid stress, but Schulman says that when we always avoid challenge, we weaken our confidence and create fragility.
- Avoidance Hurts Confidence
- Every time we dodge something hard, we tell our brain “I can’t handle this”—and it believes us.
- Hard Things Train the Brain
- Challenging ourselves strengthens key brain areas like the anterior cingulate cortex and prefrontal cortex, which are responsible for focus, decision-making, and emotional regulation.
🧠 Neuroplasticity in Action
Just like lifting weights builds muscle, doing hard things builds mental strength. The brain rewires itself to become better at problem-solving and self-control. The more you step into challenge, the more your brain learns to expect it—and handle it.
💪 Growth Lives in the “Stretch Zone”
The sweet spot for resilience is just beyond your comfort zone—challenging, but still doable. Schulman calls this the “Goldilocks Zone” for growth: not too easy, not too overwhelming.
🧍♀️ Real-Life Example:
Schulman shares her story of Marine training—struggling with painful runs and wanting to quit. But she didn’t. She “embraced the suck” and felt stronger and prouder because of it.
Her message: Growth hurts in the moment, but builds strength for the long term.
🛠 How to Apply This in Everyday Life
- Change your mindset
- Discomfort isn’t a red flag—it’s a sign of progress.
- Do one brave thing a day
- Take one small, uncomfortable action toward a goal. Speak up. Start something. Apply anyway.
- Find supportive people
- You don’t need to do hard things alone. Surround yourself with those who believe in your growth.
🌱 Final Takeaway:
Discomfort isn’t a threat—it’s an invitation to grow. Avoiding challenge chips away at self-confidence, but facing it builds strength, pride, and resilience.
Easy won’t change you. Hard might.
Castle on a hill
📚 Reference:
Schulman, J. (2025, May 29). Embrace the Suck: Discomfort Can Build a Better You. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/self-made/202505/embrace-the-suck-discomfort-can-build-a-better-you
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